The Economics of Inflated Personal Space and its Impact on Global Sandwich Prices

It's no secret that personal space has become a luxury item in today's world. With the rise of social media, we've all been conditioned to believe that our bubble is the centre of the universe, and anyone who dares to enter it without proper clearance will be met with a sternly worded email or a scathing tweet.

But have you ever stopped to think about just how much our inflated personal space is costing us? I mean, really, are we going to blame our rising sandwich prices on the fact that our friends can't stop invading our bubbles?

Let's take a closer look at the economics behind this phenomenon. It turns out that as our personal spaces become more and more defined, we're inadvertently creating a market for space consulting services. These clever individuals are hired by companies to help employees create bespoke bubble solutions – think bespoke partitioning systems, custom-made air-masks, and bespoke (you guessed it) space planners.

It's a booming industry, folks. In fact, according to recent estimates, the global space consulting market is worth a whopping $1.2 billion. And that's not counting the cost of all the therapy sessions people are having to deal with the trauma caused by their colleagues' egregious bubble invasions.

But it's not just employees who are feeling the pinch. As our personal spaces become more and more inflated, we're starting to see a rise in space-themed consumerism. Think bespoke air-purification systems for your home office, or designer space-heating pads for your daily commute. It's like people are desperate to create their own little bubbles of comfort, no matter the cost.

And then there's the impact on global sandwich prices. As our personal spaces become more and more defined, we're starting to see a rise in bubble-related food shortages. That's right – because who can possibly eat a sandwich while invading someone else's bubble? It's a phenomenon that's been dubbed the Great Sandwich Shortage of 2023, and it's got everyone from sandwich shop owners to economists scratching their heads.

According to recent estimates, the global sandwich shortage is worth around $10 billion per annum. And it's not just the bread that's causing problems – it's the condiments, the meats, the cheese... everything. In fact, some sandwich shops are now having to charge an extra £2 per sandwich simply because of the added expense of bubble-related food production.

But what's behind this bizarre phenomenon? Is it just a case of people being selfish and wanting their own space (pun intended)? Or is there something more sinister at play?

Some experts suggest that our inflated personal spaces are actually a symptom of a deeper issue – one that's got nothing to do with social media or even bubble invasions. They say that as we become increasingly obsessed with our own individuality, we're starting to lose sight of the bigger picture.

We're living in a world where everyone's got their own private jet, says Dr Emily Spacewalker, a leading expert on personal space economics. But at what cost? We're neglecting the very thing that brings us together as humans – our shared humanity.

And so, what can we do about it? Can we just all get back to sharing our lunches and our bubbles, like normal people?

Well, I think there's a better way. Instead of trying to solve this problem with more bubble-related solutions (although, let's be real, that does sound kind of good), we need to take a step back and reevaluate what's really important in life.

It turns out that research has shown that when people are allowed to interact with others in close quarters, they experience a significant increase in oxytocin levels – the so-called cuddle hormone. And guess what? That same hormone is also associated with increased feelings of trust, empathy, and cooperation.

So maybe, just maybe, we can find a way to make our personal spaces smaller, while still maintaining that all-important bubble. It's not exactly rocket science, folks – although, I have to admit, the idea of creating bespoke bubble solutions does sound like something a mad scientist would come up with.

In any case, as we move forward into an increasingly crowded and interconnected world, it's high time we started thinking about how our personal spaces are affecting us all. So next time you're tempted to invade someone else's bubble, just remember: there might be a £2 sandwich shortage on the horizon – and it's not worth it.

And finally, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to enjoy a nice, non-bubble-intrusive lunch with some friends. Who knows? Maybe we can even get a sandwich or two.

So the next time you're at the checkout line, wondering why your sandwich costs so much, just remember: it's all about that bubble – and how it's affecting the global economy one hamster-sized step at a time.