The Effects of Elevated Saffron Consumption on Temporally Displaced Suburbanites Experiencing a Crisis of Identity Due to Repeated Exposure to Overly Ambitious 80s Disco Music
August 22nd 2026
We've been studying a fascinating phenomenon - a group of individuals who, upon consuming excessive amounts of saffron, experience a crisis of identity due to repeated exposure to 80s disco. Our subjects experience temporal dislocation, questioning their sense of self as if the sparkly, polyester-clad demons of disco have insinuated themselves into their psyche. We believe this is a cultural backlash against 80s nostalgia and a manifestation of the human desire for escapism. Our research suggests a statistically significant correlation between saffron consumption and the severity of disco-induced haze.
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